We had some feedback from our classmates and tutors and we now feel that the banjo homage isn't going to work. So on friday me and Rachel discussed what to do because we were getting no closer to hammering down a story. After some bouncing of ideas, we came up with this:
So if we start with them in the plane. Aaron pretends to shove Malcolm out of the plane. Malcolm recovers and understandably backslaps Aaron in the chest or something.
Now I'm not sure whether to have the 'after you, no after you' thing start here or just have Aaron jump out and Malcolm take a breath and follow.
Anyway, Malcolm is unstable at first but finds balance and is rather pleased with himself. Until he sees Aaron already showing off (insert mildly impressive pose here). Malcolm rises to this and attempts a simple trick (insert etc etc). Aaron does something a little more complex and Malcolm again attempts something a bit more trixy. (we could do this once more, we could even work in a pose for both of them together if it got them looking at the ground - like that surf one)
Whatever way, they notice the ground/altimeter and Aaron indicates that its time to pull the chutes. Malcolm goes to pull his but Aaron starts doing chicken impressions. Malcolm stops and holds out, he gestures 'after you'. Aaron pretends to go to pull his but makes a show of not doing so, he returns the gesture. Malcolm looks down and back at Aaron, making his decision. He crosses his arms or something, set on not letting his brother win. (We could have Aaron start to look nervous at this point but doesn't want to look the weak one)
Approaching impending tree crash shot. Black out with sounds. Both in tree, Malcolm looking annoyed and Aaron looking rather amused. Aaron gives Malcolm a playful shove (aah that was fun!) but Malcolm back slaps him again. Perhaps they carry on punching for the end.
We wanted to return to the 'fun' we wanted to have in our animation in the beginning so put tricks back in. We met up the next day to talk about what tricks we wanted to put in. We wanted to build up the tricks so we agreed that the first tricks each character does should be a standard and plausible sky dive trick. Aaron is to do a backflip and to retaliate Malcolm is going to do a handstand and look like he's walking on his hands.
We wanted to escalate from here into something unusual. I personally was worried about how to proceed as the banjo's were described as 'too far-fetched' by our tutor. I wasn't sure if this would apply to any prop we thought of. Then Rachel reminded me that this is a cartoon, we didn't want it to be a realistic representation of skydiving. If cartoons can get away with hammer space then so can ours. So as a homage to Wile E Coyote, the next trick will be Aaron will pull out a sign saying 'You Suck!' on it after not being impressed by Malcolm's trick. Malcolm will pull out another bigger sign saying something like 'Yeah well your face SUCKS!' This sparks some anger and the two begin fighting in mid-air. No serious combat moves, just sibling fighting. During the fight they would notice the ground getting closer and then proceed into the daring as before.
We were both happy about this so I started storyboarding today and Rachel started character profiles and document templates for our hand-in.
While storyboarding, it occurred to me that we could actually finish the air stuff right when they noticed their tree impending doom and then have them crash into it. We could either take out the dare completely or put a shortened bit of it into the plane scene. I let Rachel know my thoughts and she agreed that this would allow us to spend more time with them in the plane and on the tricks. It would also ensure the animation wouldn't get too long. Apparently the idea is flexible enough for us to re-arrange things when necessary! Yay! Since this way had a nice pace to it, we agreed to change it to this:
Plane scene as normal, bit of a dare and then a playful shove and scuffle. Aaron falls out plane first and Malcolm follows. Tricks then fighting in which Aaron gets Malcolm in a headlock. Malcolm notices altimeter is in red and both look at the tree speeding towards them. Black out with sounds of crashing. Return to see characters in tree, Aaron thinks it's funny and slaps Malcolm on back, Malcolm takes offence and hits him back. Pair start scuffling again.
Will upload a storyboard soon. I've already done half of it so the dare won't be in the plane section but I'll add that to the animatic. The storyboard will just be cut at the fight scene and I'll add notes about the dare.